Layers of expectation could be weighing you down too
What is expected of you?
Have you ever let yourself feel out how many identities you carry?
Nope, neither did I until I felt them melt away one day.
Like you, I can overthink, a lot and it gets in the way of progress. But when you hit that sweet spot of flow–state, nothing expects anything of you, least of all, yourself. Have you noticed that?
Do me a favour. Sit back and break down who you are and what is expected of you. In case you struggle, like I have, here are some of mine:
I am a feminine looking woman who has beauty expectations to live up to.
I am in my early thirties with a career to work on.
I am a supportive friend, helping to unload the burdens of life.
I am a daughter, sister, aunty, great-aunty.
Self, societally, whatever type of imposed you want to call these identities they still exist and are heavy. But who are you when you run? When you’re deep in drawing, reading, painting, playing a game or writing?
When I run, I’m just running. That is all. I move my legs, arms and breath.
If I start to think of much else I can feel the burden of identity in my heavier breathing. It’s too much. Does the pressure of identify rid you of moving forward?
The importance of identity
But — I hear you say — identity is important, it makes me what I am.
You are right and it is your right. Just double check with yourself that they are your identities. The ones you choose. The ones that have the responsibility and burdens you want to carry.
This is why when sometimes people ask why pronouns and gender are so important, one reason I can always give is: expectation. For example, the label “woman” has so many burdens as well as blessings. But being in that flow-state reached while running, just surviving. I am human and so are you.
In those quiet, simple moments you can feel as close to peace and life itself. Catch me out of breath from running and you’ll find I’m at my most alive. If I could peak into you during a flow-state I bet you are too.
Take away
Other than spouting off about frolicking in the sun what I wanted from writing this is that you reader, let yourself be who you want to be while in your best and peaceful state. Strip yourself down to the bare minimum.
Say to yourself who you are and just be that person, thing, state that you want to be. It could help you shake off some of the layers of identity that no longer fit you.
